How do we love God; How does God love us?

In a book that (incredibly) first came out in the 1990's, Gary Chapman proposed that there are 5 key ways by which we receive and express love. His book: "The Five Love Languages" has been, and continues to be, a best seller.

His proposition is that love is expressed fundamentally in these 5 different ways, which he calls Love Languages. In each there is massive variation in how it is expressed and received - which he calls dialects. This is his list of 5 Love Languages:

  1. Words of Affirmation
  2. Quality Time
  3. Gifts
  4. Acts of Service
  5. Physical Touch

He also proposes that each individual has a love language that they are particularly adept at, or respond sensitively to, more than the other languages. This he calls, the Primary Love Language (PLL).

How can we find our PLL? You can do an online survey at www.fivelovelanguages.com which will guide you through a series of questions to identify your preferences. Many intuitively know their PLL. Usually, this is what we are looking for in our relationships. It is also how we usually express love to our spouse (etc) which is great as long as that is also their PLL. If not, what is it? Learn to express love in the manner that your spouse (etc) needs to receive. It is good to be "multi-lingual".

But what about God? What is His PLL?

1 John 4:8 says:

"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love."

Since God is love, He is the full expression of love. Which means He loves fully across all Love Languages and He is receptive to our expressions of love in any Love Language. You don't have to worry that you are  expressing love in a manner that God struggles to receive. Also, you can be assured that God is speaking to you in the Love Language that you need to hear.

In future weeks, we will look at each of these Love Languages - how God could be expressing His love toward us, and how we can express our love toward Him.

God bless,



Tim Connelly

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